Anyone who tells you they know what is going on in Japan is totally full of shit. Even if they live there, and even if they are Japanese. I mean look at this – so cats and dogs dressed up as camels is pretty normal but that zebra isn’t fooling anyone. The camel humps don’t even match! It’s like he thinks we’re all too stupid to notice that 90% of his body is all black and white and striped but these big humps on his back are just naturally brown. I guess you could argue they were dyed but it’s not inconspicuous in the least.

And what’s the motive behind this anyway? It’s not like camels live some life of luxury that zebras could only dream of having. If anything zebras have it better off because you know there’s some elementary school kids in the midwest who they are pretty much the same thing as unicorns. Hell those kids probably think they can fly anyway. I mean, I guess there’s all those lions and stuff to look out for but surely there’s a better way to avoid them then some bullshit camel costume. Goddamn zebras.

Murderers. Rapists. Thieves. Gangs. Drugs. Holiday yard decorations.

Cities have a lot of problems to deal with, and arguably the worst of the worst is that filthy cesspool known as Santa Barbara. While Santa Barbarians have to deal with these problems, they also have an added horror that shocks and awes even the most jaded city dwellers. Motorcycle acrobatics. The streets there are thick with these punks taking their lives into their own hands, throwing safety to the wind and riding to and from on motorcycles while standing on the seats. It’s a goddamn shame really.

Obviously, it’s extremely difficult to reach the brakes but also do you know how much it sucks to get hit in the face by a motionless stop light hanging over a street that you are traveling down in excess of 45 miles per hour? If you are lucky you don’t, but if you live in Santa Barbara chances are you know all too well. These signs show that law enforcement clearly has a zero tolerance policy and isn’t afraid to play hardball.